
this is MY LIFE..
STAY ONLI if u care..
GET LOST if u dun..
basically thats ME!!!
when will i ever learn my lesson and study hard..
i felt so sad when my mum scold me..
partly coz of how useless i am..
partly on how sad i am..
coz all those words by my mum are so hurting...
all just pierced into my heart so deeping...
my tears just keep rolling.
non-stop.
in my heart..
i wanted so much to run away..
i wanted so much to just end my studyin life and get away with a job..
but i cant..
thinking back..
i have never been a good student..
in primary sch..
took primary 4 streaming...
did not do veri well..
ended up in EM2..
took primary 6 PSLE...
did not score what my mum had expected..
had an aggregate of 218..
ended up in a lousy neighbourhood sch, Juying Secondary School..
wasnt able to get into my ideal school..
which my mum wanted veri much for me to get into oso..
seperated frm my primary sch best buddy...
went into secondary school..
i still have not yet learn the lesson..
continue to be a child with no rules..
in secondary 1..
hooked on to irc chatting..
study is never a thing i do...
had a level position of 65...
whereby the cohort is of a total of 121...
in secondary 2...
continue with my online chatting...
ended up in the last class os express when promoted to secondary 3...
ended my secondary 2 with a class position of 31...
whereby my class have 40 ppl...
in secondary 3..
wasnt able to take Additional Mathematics coz my class doesnt have that subject...
and i continue to slack...
and i failed terribly in my humanities and english..
so i ended up retaining...
however..
i did quite well for my mathematics, mother tongue and combined science..
i got As for all these 3 subjects..
therefore when i retained..
i scored veri well and topped the class..
and ppl always call me top student..
and always say me...
"always slp in class for almost all lesson and still can be top student!!!!"
duhx..
and all becoz of this "title"
i became restless..
promoted to secondary 4...
start slackin again...
grades start dropping...
manage to scrape thru my secondary 4 life in JYSS with an acceptable End of Year result...
but still i fail my humanities...
started to study hard...
had my O levels..
got a B3 for every subject except for my combined humanities which i got an E8...
English, Emath, Amath, Mother Tongue, Combined Science all B3...
the first time i made my mum so proud of her gal...
scorin so well..
and from there i got into Singapore Polytechnic..
gettin myself a place in Chemical Process Technology...
and i started slacking..
in polytechnic...
nobody cares whether are u going for lessons..
so skipping lessons is something i mastered veri well..
i manage to scrape thru my Year 1 Sem 1...
but for my Sem 2..
had Microbiology..
a module i totally have no idea why am i taking it..
and i HATE that lecturer to the core!!!..
and of coz i repeat that module..
went to Year 2 Sem 1...
i think i can get a doctor degree for class skipping and oso sleeping in class...
everywk..
i will skip at least 2 lessons..
how great this student is hor..
and thus..
i get my "reward"
failing 3 modules..
how "clever" can i be rite??...
haha!!!~
think my studies realli is a total gone case..
if i am able to turn back the time..
i will want to turn it back all the way to my primary school..
haiz..
but i simply cant.....
不要说抱歉
面对许多人事物,我们都需要勇气。
暗恋一个人的时候,你需要勇气开口向他表白。
明恋一个人的时候,你需要勇气要求和他牵手。
选择和一个人一刀两断的时候,你需要更多更多的勇气。
...
...
...
决定把X的号码删除
(i tried. but the number have already been printed deep in my memory)
决定不再和X见面
(i tried. but X will tend to keep appearin in front of me suddenly)
决定不再和X有任何瓜葛
(i tried. but it is impossible)
决定不再为X伤心
(i tried. but it is easier said den done)
extract frm Cruz Teng blog...
this is hw i am feeling too....
everything is so true n cruel hor...
haiz....
well..
ppl.
dun worry about me.
i am fine.
have alot of thoughts in my mind.
have nt tell my parents abt it.
dun think my dad care a damn.
my mum sure say those sarcarstic remarks.
my brother sure sit dwn there listen and laugh.
what a "great" family i have hor...
bloody!
damnit!
have thoughts of quiting school and go NAFA..
study Vocal studies.
but it is so damn EXPENSIVE!!!
$12100+++
that will be my sch fees fer 3yrs of studies..
nt includin my expenses..
haiz..
think i will forgo this thought..
think i will juz keep studying.
finish this damn diploma..
go to work...
and go study in those music clinics part time.
dun ask me why i am so keen on studyin music...
the ans is juz simple..
music keeps me going.
it is something that actually prevent me frm getting bad.
yesh. i may be rebellious.
but i do know my limits.
duhx.
i do care.
but i juz dun show.
whatever it is..
all i can do nw is..
walk 1 step... look 1 step onli...
nth much happen today n yestrday..
so not much of updates..
bye bloggie..
CP4009 BASIC INSTRUMENTAL ANALYSIS --- F (REPEAT)
CP4010 ENVIRONMENTAL STUDIES A --- F (REPEAT)
CP4014 POLYMER SCIENCE --- F (REPEAT)
MS001S MATHEMATICAL GAMES AND PUZZLES --- B+
CP4089 INTRODUCTION TO MICROBIOLOGY --- D
CP4011 PROCESS INSTRUMENTATION --- D
imagine getting tis kind of results.
who can i blame?
no one but me.
like what i once said to Jian Wen..
"worry oso no use. fail oso cannot blame anyone. onli urself. blame urself for being not hardworking. blame urself for being useless."
all i can say is.
ya.
i am useless.
i can do nth.
damn it!
this results will be meaning me repeatin my whole SEMESTER!
hw great can this be?
superb.
isnt it?!
been thinkin abt everything but STUDIES..
useless bum i am 1.
i got nth up there in brain.
but juz coconut juice.
whoo...
dun need to care abt me.
i am juz beyond any help of any medicine.
no one can save me.
coz i am incurable.
thanks.
and
BYE!
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